The concept of parenting styles often seems a little outdated. Parenting styles are mostly discussed in developmental psychology and similar fields. Developmental psychologists try to find cause and effect connection between parents behaviour and the character, and future outcomes and personality traits of the child.
There are four recognised parenting styles:
Does it really matter?
If you think about your own childhood, that of your parents, or even others you may know, you can easily attribute a particular character trait, view or personality element to how that person was parented. You may catch yourself saying “well, I’m like that because…”.
Whilst I do believe that as adults we are free to make our own choices, I do think that the way we are parented has a huge impact on us as adults AND, as a parent myself now I take that very seriously.
We could debate this for ages, but here’s a snapshot of why parenting style matters.
Understanding the impact of parenting style is not a simple task because studies show that many children with the completely different backgrounds grow up into rather similar people. Their parents and the parenting styles they were exposed to were completely different, but their current behaviour, their aspirations and understanding of the world and their role in it are rather similar.
Take it seriously but don’t over think it
There is no proof that parenting style 100-percent defines the future of a particular child, but when raising children, you need to keep in mind that your influence is actually immense.
The adults children develop into are a culmination of all their experiences, with many different adults, peers, siblings and so on. As a parent though, we are responsible for nurturing the physical, emotional and social development our children.
The parent-child relationship lays the foundation for the child’s personality, life choices and overall behaviour. It can also affect the strength of their social, physical, mental and emotional health.
If you didn’t feel that your own parents parented you in the best way, as a parent yourself you can develop your own approach and style. Personally I think about the things I felt my parents did well and I repeat those things and then I adapt the things that I didn’t feel they did so well. I hope that my own children will do the same if they become parents in the future.
As parents we all want the best for our children. We want them to be happy and healthy and try their best in school, rather than have to buy essays online. There’s no one-size-fits-all when it comes to parenting and we have to adapt our style and approach as our children grow but being warm and loving as well as having boundaries and rules seems like a good way forward.
What do you think?