As a parent it can be so exciting when you see your child developing a particular skill or an obvious talent.
I’ve spoken to lots of parents over the years who I’d describe as your classic pushy parent, and in most cases the children have lost interest in whatever it was they showed real promise in early on, which seems like such a shame.
On the other hand I’ve known parents who seem totally unaware of how skilled their child is in a particular area, like one child my daughter dances with. Her mother had no understanding of how good she is or how much pleasure dancing gives her until very recently.
Whatever it is that you child shows a talent for, as parents we have to find that balance between not noticing the talent and being a total psycho about it – and that isn’t necessarily all that easy. It can be so hard to find a balance between these two extremes but I think it’s so important to try.
- Not to push but to encourage
- Not to bully but to support
- Not to lecture but to listen
- Not to profess we know it all but convey that we want to understand
- Not to let them give up at the first hurdle but understand when it might be time to try something different
It can be a real challenge for parents.
I try to give the children the tools and the opportunities to explore their talents. I try to support their efforts and praise their achievements but without forcing my views or desires on them. This isn’t easy as it can be very exciting for parents when children show a real talent in something.
Their talents belong to them not to me and they need time discover the degree to which they want to pursue these with my support, love and encouragement.
How do you go about nurturing talent?
7 comments
I always say I won’t push my daughter to do anything, i will take her to dance etc and if she goes off it I wont force her. But I really want her to do Dance haha #sharewithme
Positive words of encouragement!
Completely agree! And its not an easy one as we parents sometimes get carried away and it becomes more about us than our children. My daughter is only little but she loves dancing and performing so I let her explore it without any judgement at this age. There is nothing worse than pushy parents who think their three year old is super talented when he or she is actually just a normal child!
Love this and I am always slightly worried that me and my hubby might be those pushy parents when it comes to sports in school when they get a bit older as we both are soooo competitive. They are still too young now but I hope that we will put our own likes, dislikes, and competitiveness aside when the time comes for the kids to choose their own path and just encourage them along the way. Lovely post you are always full of such wise parenting tactics I love it. Thanks for always sharing them on #ShareWithMe Have a lovely weekend ahead.
My son is into football, so I make sure I encourage him I take him to his club practice twice a week what ever the weather
Great post. I think getting the balance can be tough especially if you see that they’ve thrived in something. But your points are spot on.
We have a rule in our house if my children want to pursue something then I will pay for them to do it on the understanding that they have to do something that I pick. So my daughter goes to gymnastics and brownies which is her choice and my choice is that she attends swimming lessons and does violin practise. That way she has an understanding its give and take and you have to work hard to achieve something you want. In the meantime hopefully she is learning two new skills 🙂